CATHERINE.
"Catherine?" His voice reached my ears, and the loud thumping of my heart became louder.
It had been too long since I heard his voice, but I had memorized it so well that I would still know it was him, even in my sleep. I slowly turned around from the top of the steps and locked my eyes with the man who gave me my first heartache.
"Hi!" It was the only thing that came out of my throat.
"You came back early." A broad smile was on his lips, which made the dimples on the sides of his cheeks appear. The same smile that would always make my knees weak
"Yeah…"
"I thought you were coming home in two weeks." He began walking up, and the moment he landed on the top step, I moved backward, which stopped him from moving forward.
I saw pain cross his eyes, but I ignored it. "I want to surprise Amara."
"I see." He opened his arms and smiled widely again. "Welcome home, little tyke."
Little tyke. Little rascal. He would call me that when we were younger, as I always ended up getting into messes, and he would always come to save me.
But surely things are different now.
And instead of scooting into his arms as I usually did whenever he offered a hug, I remained in my place. I smiled warmly at him, cocking my head to the side. "Thank you, Beta Tyler. I’ll go inside, as I want to check if they’re still awake."
He nodded his head and slowly dropped his arms to his sides. "Sure."
I grabbed my luggage and was about to turn around when he grabbed it from my hand, and his skin brushed against mine. "I’ll carry this to your room."
I held my breath and did my best not to show him that he could still affect me. "Thank you, but it’s nothing big." I answered and pulled it away from his hold.
I began walking toward the entrance of the packhouse, not giving him a second look, only to stop when I reached the door.
I turned around and found him still looking at me. "I’m sorry about Zoey and Garrett."
I didn’t know why I said that, except that I was sorry that he was feeling pain. I’d been there, and I could only imagine his pain at losing both people he loved.
He just gave me a nod, and I immediately turned around and walked inside the house and up the stairs, hurrying to get out of his sight because one more second in front of him, I might end up rushing into his arms.
As soon as I reached the last stairs going to the fourth floor, where my room was, I held on to the railings before closing my eyes and trying to steady my breathing.
He could still affect me. And damn my heart, I still wanted him.
I wiped the tears from my eyes before I dragged my luggage to my room. I needed to be strong. I wanted Tyler, but I wanted him to like me because of me, not because I was the only one left available for him.
After I left my things inside my room, I headed to the new suite with double doors on this floor. I was sure this was Amara and Jace’s new room. As much as I just wanted to lay in bed and cocoon myself under my blanket, I couldn’t step back and start from zero again.
I was already doing so well.
Jace and Amara were surprised to see me, but after the initial shock, we hugged, and they let me carry my adorable nephew, Colton.
“Are you back for good?” Jace asked.
“No. I’m moving out. I’ll stay with Grandpa Jason. I want to go to university there.” I answered in a firm voice, letting him know that my decision was final.
“Are you sure? Does Mom know about this? We have a university near the territory.”
“I haven’t told Mom and Dad, but I think it’s for the best.”
“Zoey is no longer here, Cat,” he added. “There’s no more reason for you to move out.”
“But Tyler is here,” I answered almost immediately because it was the truth. I wanted him, yet I didn’t want him around me.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“We’re both healing from our own pain, and I don’t want the circumstances to push us together. I am okay now. I just need to be consistent. I will come home when I’m ready.”
“So there’s no chance for you and Tyler?” He asked.
“Are you pushing me into your Beta?”
“No, it’s not like that. I just thought there was a possibility….”
“Let him rest from his pain. He can’t enter another relationship just a few weeks after the last one. So only time will tell. His separation from Zoey doesn’t mean I will have a place in his heart. I don’t want to be someone’s rebound or because they no longer have a choice. I deserve someone who will choose me for me.”
“Cathy…” Jace wanted to say something, but I cut him off.
“And I have a mate somewhere. I just need to find him or for him to find me.” I was so impressed with the words coming out of my mouth as if I already had my life planned out. Maybe for some time, I did, but seeing Tyler tonight slowly crumbled my walls.
He was still my weakness, but I couldn’t do this again. I needed to be away from him.
SIX MONTHS LATER. TYLER. I puffed the cigarette in my hand as I stared at the darkness in front of me. I was standing outside Jason and Jessica’s home in Bernice City. Alpha Jace and Luna Amara, together with their son Colton wanted to visit their grandparents and Catherine. Catherine had been living here since she got back from traveling abroad. She was moving on with her life while I was still stuck in the same place I’d been — still lost and trying to find meaning for my existence. She rarely visited the territory, and I knew it had something to do with me. I had no idea which was hurting me the most: losing the chance to love her or losing the friendship we had nurtured since childhood. A car stopped in front of the gate of their home, and Catherine climbed out, giggling, before waving to her friends. I glanced at the clock on my wrist. It was already past six in the evening. Does the university end classes around this time? "Tyler?" Her voice came out soft and sweet. I m
TYLER."I always do, Tyler. But you’re not returning the favor." She said the last part in a low voice before she slid out of her chair and turned around, ready to walk away.I felt every word she said, and it hurt. Because all the while, I thought everything I did was to protect her heart. How would I know I would still end up hurting her?My hand coiled on her wrist as I pulled her back gently. "Where are you going?" "I want to dance." She pulled her arm away from me gently."Alone?""I've been dancing alone for a while now. I’m used to it.""Then dance with me." I wanted to pull her closer, but like before, I didn’t want to take advantage."I’m not sure if I can beat the last dance partner you had." She said before biting her bottom lip.How do I tell her I never had any dance partners at all? Zoey and I never attended balls together, except once held in her territory for Lawrence's birthday gala, but we didn’t dance together. We simply showed up."I never had one except the littl
*FLASHBACK.Catherine - 8 years oldTyler, Jace, Austin - 10 years old CATHERINE. I wore a light purple t-shirt that I tucked inside my white shorts. I had already slipped on my running shoes, and my hair was pulled up into a ponytail to make sure it wouldn’t go to my face. I was all geared up for play. I just needed to wait. I sat at the end of my bed, hands clasped together, watching the clock intently. When the big hand pointed to the number 9, I jumped up and ran out of my bedroom. It was fifteen minutes before four in the afternoon. I heard Jace telling Tyler and Austin they would go to the clearing inside the forest at this time. I ran down the stairs and out of the front door. I was right. They were already walking away with the other boys around their age. I stopped at the top of the steps and counted how many there were. One, two, three, …. seven, eight, nine. Yes! There were only nine! They would need one more! I skipped the stairs and ran fast to follow them, b
CATHERINE. “Why are you smiling?” Tyler asked and it snapped me away from the memory playing in my head. We were driving toward the restaurant of my choice so we could eat something as we were both hungry. I smiled at him as I contemplated telling him my thoughts. Because before that, I was thinking of the words I told him — that I was the only one protecting his heart and that he never did it for me. But then, so many memories of our childhood came flooding back, where Tyler had never let me down. Jace had always been a good brother, but Tyler was more protective when it came to me. It was why Mom would always ask him to watch me as well, in case Jace might not. Because between the three of them — Tyler, Austin, and Jace — Tyler was the most responsible one. “You’re not sharing, and yet you keep smiling. It makes me curious.” He said, a broad smile on his lips, and I wished I hadn’t glanced in his direction because he looked too sexy from this angle. Oh, damn this. He looked
TYLER. “I missed you...” I whispered, hoping she would say those words back, but there was just silence, and it hurt. “Please, let me make it up to you. Let’s start over again.” Catherine sighed deeply before pulling away from my arms, but she didn’t move too far. Our faces were so close that her breath was fanning against my skin. “I’m not sure I understand what you are expecting when you say start over again.” She said “Pick up where we left off before you went to Australia.” “I’m not the same person anymore, Tyler. If you think I’m still the same girl who’s head over heels for you….” “I never meant that way.” But that truth hurts. It was a confirmation that I was not the center of her universe anymore. “Can we go back to being friends, and will you allow me to pursue you this time?” She was just looking at me, and I was having a hard time reading her thoughts. Was that a no? “I can wait too. If you don’t want me pushing myself on you, I can wait. But I mean, can we still be
CATHERINE.The late dinner with Tyler was awesome. In fact, the whole night with him was perfect. He had always been great company, but tonight was special. Whether there were people around us or just us in the car, he would look at me as if I were the only one he was seeing. His eyes would always search for mine, and his hands would always brush the stray hair away from my face like he didn’t want even a single strand to block his view of me. Tyler had always been attentive to me, but not this focused that I couldn’t help but revel in it.After dinner, we walked around the city, just checking out the crowd and the places that were still open. I showed him the direction that would lead to my university, and although he wanted me to take him there tonight, I told him I could do it some other day. And I thought that made him happy. “So that means I get to take you out again so we can go around the city and the places around here. Right?” He asked. We were already on our way back to w
TYLER. I was lying in bed, looking up at the ceiling, still thinking about how the night turned out perfectly. Before I met Zoey, Catherine and I would spend most of our time together whenever I was not overloaded with work. She would even sometimes hole up in the office with me, doing her schoolwork while I finished my task. And yes, she would flirt with me, but I had learned to mask my emotions from her and simply ignore her at times. But tonight, it was refreshing to let my guard down around her. I always liked when she flirted with me way back then. Even though she wasn’t doing it at this point, she was starting to loosen up, and seeing her cheeks turn scarlet red when I complimented her warmed my heart. “Oh, fuck!” I grunted as I got up from bed. I grabbed my shirt, pulled it on my head, and put on sweatpants before leaving the bedroom. I headed for her room, and after three soft knocks, she opened it. I almost choked when I saw her in her satin short pajamas with her nipples
CATHERINE. My phone pinged. I used to dread that sound, but not anymore. Ever since Tyler was here last week, he has been messaging me nonstop, which has always been the highlight of my days. The only time I would not receive anything from him would be when he had things to do, but he would inform me beforehand. Tyler was giving me the dream that I always dreamed of — his attention. And despite the distance between us, he was making sure I felt that he was interested in me. I walked to the living room from the kitchen, as I wanted the phone away from me so I wouldn’t get tempted to message him, as he said he would be in a meeting. My face lit up when I saw Tyler’s name pop up and his message on the home screen. Tyler: How are you? Catherine: Fixing dinner. Your meeting took so long to finish. What did Jace want this time? T: The meeting was over hours ago. C: *rolling eyes emoji* T: Did you miss me? C: My ears missed the sound of my phone pinging. T: No one is texting you